Sunday, September 14, 2008

Driving glory

The below details are absolutely non-fictious.Any resemblance to any living or dead idiot is as intentional as possible.

“I’ve got a fast car…..”.Whenever I hear that famous Tracy Chapman song my mind conjures up the pleasant image of a cool guy in a flashy red sports car ,a ‘scorpions’ tune on his lips,wind in his hair etc etc.Nowadays the image remains more or less the same except that the dude is now replaced with a dudess (cool female of the homo sapiens linn. Species), a ‘scorpions’ tune on HER lips, wind in HER hair etc etc.Duh?
It was a couple of weeks ago when I was cruising along in my not so flashy car when something red and in a terribly tearing hurry whizzed past me (overtaking from the wrong side too) .Was it a bird ,was it a plane….no… it wasn’t superman either…at least not the man part. I was literally shaken and it took all of my presence of mind (whatever little is present )and incredible skills (incredible as in you wouldn’t believe they’re so bad )behind the wheel to keep my poor car steady. The joker in the red Skoda Laura was a 40 something lady, generously built and nourished …and generously made-up, decked under a couple of coats of heavy make-up in an apparently not so successful attempt at looking younger.The finer details of the creature of course registered only when the Skoda rather hesitantly skidded to a halt on the red signal ahead.(For a moment I wondered whether the bull would actually get turned on by the red light and cut through it).But she did know at least some of the traffic rules it seemed.
.There was a time not so long ago when you got angry at female drivers because they were too slow.You kept honking away to glory and the only discernable result would be a stinging in your ear.The sari or salwar in front would be absolutely unfazed, and when you finally go past them they’d give you a frosty look as if to suggest that honking the car horn was either plain indecent or only for emergencies. There was also a time when a women driver basically meant an elegant lady in some ‘feminine’ kind of vehicle –Maruti 800s,fiats ,santros etc.But now you have these characters riding anything you can imagine from bikes to SUVs and riding them as recklessly as the guys do!The worst part is you can't even cuss them freely …no matter how wrong they may be!The liberated ‘Bharatiya Nari’ is surely going places…

disclaimer 2
This blog is pure nonsense and readers are advised to take it as such.I am not sexist, racist or any of the similar despicable ‘ists’ except maybe a bit of an eternal pessimist.

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